I’m happily married but also in love with someone else

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At some point, I asked him, "You have everything except time so what are you doing in a school that's suppose to take us to where you already are?" He laughed and said, "Money isn't everything.” School vacated and for two weeks I didn't see him. We became two adults who liked each other but couldn't say it because of our situation. It became palpable when the two of us were together. The two of them talked as if they knew each other already. He said, "Your wifeshe's a good person. If I didn't meet her, I don't think I would be able to complete this course." My husband asked, "You've been copying her work errn?" He answered, "Copy? She does the whole thing for me." The two gentlemen burst out laughing while I stood there saying in my head, "How could you two be so awesome to me at the same time?". I thought introducing James to my husband would help curb the feeling I had for him. My husband could call and asked why I hadn't come home after school and I could proudly say, "James doesn't understand what a lecture taught today so I'm taking him through it." He had no problem with it as far as it was James. "I was scared. I didn't want to start a fire I couldn't quench. Each day the feeling grew stronger. I could sleep next to my husband and imagined it was James I was sleeping with. When we got intimate, it was the face of James I imagined. When my husband stood naked in front of me, I asked,"How would it feel like to have James stand in front of me like this? My feelings and thoughts got messed up. He said, "You're trying so hard but the two of us are adults, why don't we talk about it?". "You won't try to kiss me again and you won't take me home again when we close from lectures. Going forward, the two of us won't be alone in any place or whatsoever. You won't call me unless it's a life and death issue. No more lunch together." We said a whole lot of things but the barrier we sort to create soon caved in on us. I felt if he kissed me, he'll notice I'd kissed someone else. He responded, "If you want to be cold, be. If you want to be hot, just be. Stop alternating between the two and be firm.” We started avoiding each other until finally, we completed school. It's been two years already since we left school. Source | Summary